NBC News Headline #3

I was reading some news and stumbled upon headline #3 and couldn’t stop laughing.  I figured my friends would enjoy this as well so I took a screenshot, enjoy:

Olympic Walking

Yes, that is correct – there is at least one walking competition in the Olympics.  I stumbled upon this unfortunate fact last night when I decided I would watch some late night Beijing Olympics.  At first, I thought it was a normal race because the camera was only showing the top half of the athletes (from that view it looks like they are running).  However, when I saw a full shot, it was clear that something was just not right.  Instead of full strides, all of the womens’ legs were wiggling like wet noodles while making little baby steps.  It looked ridiculous.  It must be so frustrating having to power-walk 20 kilometers.  By the way, what they were doing was on the very thin border between walking and running.  To ensure that they were not running, referees stand on the side of the path (yes they walk on a path with little flowers on the edge, oh what a lovely merry day!) and can step in front of the walkers at any time with a little red paddle disqualifying them from the race.

Who thought this was an Olympic sport?  If someone came up to me, and told me they won the gold medal for walking, I don’t think I could respond with a straight face.  I also want to know why Olympic Softball is being removed from the next Olympic games but Walking is an acceptable ’sport’ to leave in.  If Olympic walking is an acceptable competition, why don’t we add the 100 Meter Doggy Paddle into the swimming competition?  Actually, in the spirit of swimming, there should be all different sorts of land based running and/or walking races.  How about to 20k backwards walk?  Maybe the 200M skipping competition.

I think the ultimate race would be the 1500 meter synchronized three-legged potato sack backward skipping hurdles.

The most hilarious ABC news comment of all time.

This is an update to my “ABC News Comments are Batshit Crazy” post. I have stumbled upon what could possibly be the most hilarious/stupidest post ever made on ABC News:

“I guess it did not take long for you anti-american (i.e., democrats) to continue your hate-filled postings on this site. Give me a break! Do you really think that Barry Obama’s hands our clean when it comes to his choice of associates (e.g., Reverend Wright, Louis Farrakhan, William Ayres, etc…)? I think not. Frankly, it sickens me that you feeble minded morons are posting your hate-filled garbage so soon after the death of Tim Russert. I for one really view his death as a wake-up call. Life is too short to spend your time posting lunatic rants (like the ones below) on websites that nobody is reading. You people are sad and need to get a life!” – Aaron Burr

It looks like Aaron Burr has lost another duel, only this time with himself.

Comments on ABC News are batshit crazy

Recently, I have noticed that the people who comment on ABC News articles are absolutely nuts.  The majority of the quotes I found are anti-Obama, but there are plenty of stupid things being said by people of all political beliefs on ABC News.  Here are a few gems I picked out:

“Obama is such a baby.

He can’t even defend his comments and this AGAIN shows how inexperienced he is at foreign policy.

Obama should return to his old district and “finally” help the poor people in the “south-side” of Chicago.

Americans “aren’t” going to promote a guy that never “solved” the problems of the folks he represented at the state level.

Regarding Obama…………..NEXT!”

I “really” think quotes are “great” tool to make your “point” seem more “valid.”

“GET OUT OF IRAQ! NOW!” -Sisto Maximo

This person’s posts almost always are composed of one capitalized line of text.  Sisto Maximo has other great hits such as “STOP BUSH TORTURE NOW!” and “Cheany! Stop The Torture! Now!”

“Barack Hussein Obama is a spineless, wimpy, wussy of a weenie. That’s why he will lose 40 states this November.” – Carlos

I think this brilliant statement stands on its own.  Carlos forgot to mention he was going to beat Obama up around the back of his elementary school later that afternoon (but before his mom picked him up of course!).  However, this does bring me to a subject that many ABC comments love to hit: the fact that ‘Hussein’ is Obama’s middle name.  Here are a few more examples of this phenomenon:

“Obama HUSSEIN will destroy this country if he gets in!” – Joe

 ”Dear lovers of the Magic Negro, This country will never ever trust its security to Barry Hussein Obamba. I’m sure all the Ayatollahs in Iran are jumping for joy that there Muslim Brother may take the reins of power of the great Satan.The silent majority will hold its nose and vote for John McCain.” -jimbeaux

Joe and Jimbeaux, thank god you have found out Barack ‘the Magic Negro’s’ true intentions.  Choosing a candidate must be easy when you are ignorant and racist.  I hope the choices for the 2012 election are Barack Obama and another Black American so you will have to stay home and not vote.

“George Adolph Bush is a lovely man.” – I Can Lie, Too

I see what you did there!  This type of statement is about as helpful as Joe’s up above.

“many sux democrats are piece of sh*t, lying dirtbags. Lie so much can’t remember what TRUTH “is”. But I guess it depends on your definition of what is is hey.” – USA

Well I don’t know if I can argue with this solid statement since it was written by the country I live in.  If anyone should have a say in who leads the USA, it is the USA itself.  However, I have a hankering suspicion that this is, in fact, not a comment from the USA.  Additionally, LOL WUT?

“Promises made during a campaign are meant to be broken. This is true for every canidate. No one can forsee what any of the Presidential Canidates would do once elected into office. To bad the media has not made a “Truth O Meter” during their campaign speeches. Instead we are subjected to endless news talk shows with diverse, extreme, wacky and alien opinions. Makes a person want to Barf. Hello, is there anyone normal out there.” – Spiderman

Well, uh, actually this one isn’t too bad.  Thank you Spiderman for taking time out of your busy crime fighting schedule to show us an example of a useful response to a news article.  However, please don’t make another movie. Oh, and it is spelled candidate  not canidate.  I thought you were smarter than that Peter Parker!

Look around you – Maths

I haven’t posted in a while since I have been extremely busy at work and therefore too lazy and tired at night to write anything. However, today I have stumbled upon this fantastic educational video. It is from the “Look around you” series of videos on the BBC. I think this is the video Hillary Clinton used to teach her campain how to do arithmatic. Enjoy.

B is for

Bestiality

and also the Bible, which this site illustrates via legos.

Naked Pictures of Your Buddy’s Girlfriend Video

This is absolutely hilarious. Make sure you watch the entire video.

from www.break.com posted with vodpod

G35 + Boxer Puppy = Oh Sh*t!

Edit: The link was broken.  It should be working now.

This guy learned a lesson the hard way. Here is the post with what happened.

Picture of the troublemaker:

Who is Pirate Robot Ninja?

More like what is a Pirate Ninja Robot. Pirate Ninja Robots are so advanced, so complex, so incredibly dangerous, that no human has seen one and lived to tell about it. This is why I must broadcast from Space. Coincidentally, Pirate Ninja Robots love technology, film, music, art, and other earthly subjects. In order for you to feel more comfortable with the concept of Pirate Ninja Robots, I have painstakingly assembled the most accurate rendering of a Pirate Ninja Robot to date:

Okay, I am not actually a combination of a Pirate, Ninja and a Robot.  I made the name Pirate Ninja Robot because it has something for everybody (and it is awesome).  I think it is safe to say 99.9% of people like Pirates, Ninjas, or Robots.  I happen to like all three.  I am really just here to have fun, and write about whatever I feel like.  If I happen to sound like a Pirate Ninja Robot while doing so, then that’s great.